


Day 120

by Josh_the_Bard



Series: A Year in Kirkwall [120]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:01:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23914225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Josh_the_Bard/pseuds/Josh_the_Bard
Series: A Year in Kirkwall [120]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1589257





	Day 120

Aveline realized she had not seen Melindra out of her armor before. When she was a regular guardsman, Aveline hadn’t spent much time socializing with her superiors. After Aveline had leapfrogged up to the captaincy she had been too busy doing her job to socialize with her guards. Except Donnic of course, but that had taken a miracle.

The Sisters had covered the face in a thick veil that hid the gory mess the pride demon had made of Merlindra’s face. Aveline remembered the woman as having statuesque features and she was sorry her family couldn’t see it one last time. The dress she was wearing was green and yellow with a tiny bit of orange embroidery, probably the most extravagant dress she owned. It would have made her look magnificent when she was alive.

Near the pyre stood her family. Her parents were there trying to look sotic and proud instead of heartbroken. Her brother and his family were there as well, dressed in the beautiful mourning clothes. There was another woman with them who was absolutely beside herself with grief. Aveline had seen her one or twice with Merlindra at the barracks but she didn’t know her name. 

Jansen and his family had come for the funeral as well. They maintained a respectful distance but had brought a small offering for the pyre. It was one of Jansen’s son’s swaddling blankets with the words ‘thank you’ stitched into it. A reminder of what Merlindra’s sacrifice had bought.

The Revered Mother was making a speech about duty and sacrifice and about how wonderful it was to be brought to the Maker’s side. Aveline wasn’t paying her any attention. Her thoughts were more earthly. Aveline knew without a shadow of a doubt that her guards were the very best that Kirkwall had to offer. They put their lives on the line every day, for very little thanks, in order to keep everyone else safe. They stood between citizens and death and the only reward most of them got was ending up like Merlidra, taken from the world far before their time. Over the past three years, Aveline had worked as hard as she could to keep her guards safe, and it had all come crashing down in an instant when the Qunari attacked.

Sometime during the speech, Hawke had come to stand beside her. He said nothing but Aveline felt strengthened by her friend’s presence. Her oldest friend, she realized. Everyone else was either dead, or back in Fereldon.

“When is it enough?” she asked. The question wasn’t really directed at Hawke, but he answered all the same.

“It’s never enough,” he said. “There are always more threats, more people who need saving. No matter how you try you can never save them all. All you can do is try harder next time.”

Aveline felt a slight pain in her chest as she remembered Wesley. She had put everything into saving him and it hadn't been enough, it must be worse for Hawke. His sister, his brother and his mother had all died while Hawke tried, and failed, to save them. Aveline knew there was nothing he could have done better but she also knew that didn’t matter one bit when it was your family on the pyre.

“But it’s also always enough,” Hawke continued. “A son will grow up knowing his father because of her. Many sons and daughters I’ll wager. A wife still had her husband. If it was you lying on that pyre, would you have any regrets?”

“No,” Aveline said without hesitation. “But I’m not the one on the pyre today. Melinda was a good woman and she deserved better.”

“A noble sacrifice holding a demon at bay,” Hawke mused. “I can think of worse ends. Knowing me I’ll probably starve to death having gotten lost in some cave somewhere.”

Aveline smiled despite herself. “Hawke, if you get me lost in a cave, I’ll strangle you before you have a chance to starve.” Sometimes Aveline felt very alone in the world. Donnic was lovely and exactly who she wanted to come home to after a long day but he didn’t know loss like she and Hawke. There was a morbid comfort in that shared pain.


End file.
